In my quest to get to my desired goal. It seems so hard. Now I''m back beating myself up again. I know what it means to trust God. But ,I know to that we are to be busy doing something too. I thought, I read "FAITH WITHOUT WORKS IS DEAD". So I have questions as to Why when I'm working to get to my goal, I'm at the door of whatever it is (unspoken) and it seems like the door won't open and then when it does..."SLAM!".
Then that takes me into a mode I don't like...
"ALL MY LIFE, I HAD TO FIGHT".....snap,snap ( snapping fingers).....
back to blogging....Whew! OK!
I had to take a day to chill out... I walked...rode the bus, cried, talk to myself......looks like when your upset everybody and their brother want to talk to you....so I faked it...talked as cheerful as I could, made it back home and had a new out look on things.....THANK THE LORD!..CAUSE FOR A MINUTE THERE I WAS...i won't even say. So now that I had that kind of a day, where do I go from here....I'll get back in it to win it. Because God can not use quiters and cowards.
I'M NOT GONNA SAY I'VE CRIED MY LAST TEAR...because that would not be the truth. And for me crying is cleansing. And it's in the Word that the Lord bottles up our tears... (PSALMS 56 : 8) now how special is that. There is a song that says "YOUR TEARS ARE ONLY TEMPORARY" again how nice is that....So that let's me know (we are going to) have to cry. So let me pick myself up out of the pity box and get back to heading toward my goal.
And stop looking a hot mess like this web cam pic. This is not of the day I'm speaking of right now. But is one those others...
As always
Readers, Be Blessed!!
** Keep me in your high mind..
Because I'm going somewhere...**
I had stated in a previous entry that, one step that "I" had made there was a blockage. But not in those exact words.... So now I , not the "I" I, but with the help of the Lord I will step out again. So on last night I received a call at 8:31 PM. The person on the other told me that they got my message that I left on the fourth of July. And that it made the day a good work day for them. And went on to tell me how funny the message was and that they were sorry that the thing that I was attempting did not work out . But they were glad that I did not have a defeatist attitude about it.
We went on with the setting up the appointment that I requested......so on and so fourth. Then they told me that at the rate, I'm going toward what I'm trying to achieve, I would arrive in no time.
I Thank and praise God for letting me come in contact with whom he sees fit. And by doing so , I'm even more pumped up for this journey. I have heard of people saying you can get more help from strangers than your own family and the people you are the close to. And that is a sad fact...... to come to realize.
So I'm going all the way and with God walking this journey with me I know I'm going to win. Be cause this morning I awoke out of my sleep with a jerk... And when I rose I began to rebuke everything that was not of The right Spirit. The dream I had was that I was in class and was summoned to the main office for a phone call and it was this same person that had held me back in my youth,young adult life. I keep a journal and pen in the bed with me so I can get every detail down .
This time ,I'm going somewhere. And nothing is going to stop me this time. I going after everything the d---- has stole from me.....
I AM SO GLAD TO GET BACK TO MY BLOG. AND I'M NOT GOING TO SAY THAT THE LAST GAP IN POSTING WILL NOT BE REPEATED , BECAUSE LIFE IS HAPPENING EVERYDAY. AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL CAUSE ME NOT TO GET HERE.
** at this time, there is some moving and shaking going on, for my betterment, so keep me in praying as the Lord lead and guide this transition**
BUT I THANK EACH AND EVERYONE FOR HANGING IN THERE WITH ME. I THANK YOU JUST FOR YOU STOPPING IN TO BROWSE EVEN FOR ONE MINUTE.
WHILE I WAS AWAY, I WENT THROUGH A LITTLE BIT OF THIS,ALITTLE BIT OF THAT, AND JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING...."BUT GRACE BE TO GOD WHO GIVES US THE VICTORY \O/,IN CHRIST JESUS".
As I sat making a ruff draft,for this post I took a brake. And I just went to different sites that I routinely visit. And to my amazement. This is what I needed to hear at that particular moment. *A RIGHT NOW WORD*
Prophetess Stacey Woods,a young sister on Fire for the Lord. Who has been a Blessing to me.
****Please take the time,to visit: S.W.M., INC.
Prophetic Company K. A. Fellowship
Promise Center K. A. Ministry
(the video post above is used with permission.)
"MY LIFE"
(but everybody else first)
Living my life has not been easy. But as I keep living I'm finding that I really don't know who I am. Now let's just see who has been presented.
1. YES,to others and not to me.
2. PEOPLE PLEAS ER,the need.
3. MOTHER,to over 35- three my own/1 grandson,not included in the 35.
4. DOORMAT,not speaking up for myself.
5. RUNNER,not this is the one that takes the cake.
6. MONEY TREE,to others with trickery and guilt tripping me.
7. ATM, grown children/not returning it.
I have to find out what is the most important to me right now. SO LET'S GET STARTED. God first,OF COURSE. Then my baby Jeremiah (aka Jerry) and them me. Jerry can't help himself (read grandson area).
What makes one, keep doing the same thing over and over. I ask myself. Calling it "helping",but the people you are helping, are helping themselves move right along and here I am stagnant. Now what's wrong with that picture? For now on, it will be another.....watch it, now let's just rephrase that thought....Whew!!!!!!
OK! Continuing on...For now on there will be a flat "NO!" to any request that do not fit into the plan that the Almighty has for my life.
When I'm asked/this will be my answer,"Let me seek the Lord first". Just in case it is an emergency. But on all that other stuff. A "Flat out No!" answer.
OM Gosh!, I hate to even touch on this subject. For just the thought of how many of you who would like to whip me in the spirit (QUEEN MOTHER)....OUCH!!!
----#5/ THE RUNNER / When the tough got tough,when "people"got to talking,I got to running. I guess saying that the song "STAND" wasn't out at the time....Alright, I knew that wouldn't work. lol ,I tried.
In all of that running, it allowed me to put up walls,hold out my long handle spoon,be stand offish and pick and choose, with whom I would allow in my world.
Which ended up shutting everyone out. I lost myself,along with trust not to mention that I took that to a whole new level. Stood on the scripture with that one.
Over time, I noticed that it was much better to stay in that zone. No one could hurt ( at church )me anymore if I just stay at a distance. I would reject speaking and singing engagements. It's said that if you carry out a certain thing for at least twenty days; a pattern would be established. So again I refuse, with no explanation
to go to a "Women In White Service" and render two Selections and or Be one of the Speakers.
Instead of running for the Lord, I'm been running from the Lord. Because of what "people" have done to me. How sad :(....
Glad, God is merciful,loving,kind and forgiving.
Whew!!! I can go on and on with that one :)
Having loss my self in all of the vicissitudes of life. What Keeps me is , Knowing that the Almighty, will take care of every situation.
And He's looking out for my good......Thank You Father!
Now how much do I owe him?
Enough for now....
Reader Be Blessed!!!
Until next time....
****FOOTNOTE**** As I stated in another entry here. I thank God for the memories...
Be watching for PHOTOS of services I've been Blessed to take part in.
>>>>>>>DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT>>>>PROPHETESS STACEY WOODS on the world wide web.
You will be glad you did.
My goal is to enter College for the first time. And gain the necessary skills to have a career. In which I will be able to get to, my desired goals. Also this would give me the confidence that I need to excel. This is on a personal level. On the Spiritual level: I will have the financial where with all to do more for the Kingdom of God in Advancement. Also this will help in the Department of, transportation,clothing,needs and wants....etc. One may believe that none of this counts. But I beg to differ. I believe when one is in the Kingdom family. One should have, and put on the very best for the Master. In all area's of life...
Closing Scripture: The Word of God says in Jeremiah 29:11-14 (New Living Translation), "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me in earnest, you will find me when you seek me. I will be found by you," says the Lord. "I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and bring you home again to your own land."
